Monthly Archives: February 2012

Shave It for Later

I was only twelve years old when I begged my mother to let me start shaving my legs.  She said I was too young, I whined and pleaded, and ultimately, she sat me on a folding chair in the backyard and slathered my legs with Nair.

Part rite-of-passage, part torture session, my introduction to the world of hairless legs was followed up by mom’s pit-shaving tutorial, along with a package of knee-skinning disposable razors.  (Anyone ever note how Bic rhymes with nick?) But after one particularly bloody slip-up on my ankle (no one ever believed me, but I swear I saw bone), I decided to take matters into my own hands and biked down to the local pharmacy to buy myself a sturdy, grown-up and sophisticated Personal Touch.  The package came with three free replacement blades and I remember thinking its fake tortoise shell appearance was “classy.”

Goodbye, old friend. I know you'll be shaving armpits in heaven.

Ten years later, when I lost my razor, I was disappointed to learn that Personal Touch had replaced the yellow-flecked brown of the faux tortoise shell with a more uniformly-colored plain brown plastic.  But what that second razor lacked in style, it made up for in reliability, lasting me all the way from my early 20’s up until this morning.  And it still works just fine.

The sad thing is, I can’t find blades for it because they stopped making Personal Touch razors about five or six years ago.  Much like that episode of Seinfeld where Elaine stockpiles boxes of the discontinued Today Sponge, I hoarded my finite supply of Personal Touch razor blades for years.  Then, when my stash ran out, I bought them on eBay.  And then that just got crazy.  Or, I guess, crazier.

Elaine contemplates her date's spongeworthiness.

So last week, I finally caved in and bought a slick, overly packaged mega-blade monstrosity, but only because it promised to give me creamy-smooth legs like J-Lo.  Which means I’m officially saying goodbye to my Personal Touch razor blade.   Goodbye, old friend.  I know you’ll be shaving armpits in heaven.

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Want to win an advance reader copy of REUNITED?

I know of a website for an adorable indie-rock trio from Austin where you can enter to win.

Oh, and while you're there, you may want to download some songs. For free!

Or enter here, on Goodreads.

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Filed under book blog, books, movies, YA, writing, favorite books, friendship break-ups, pop music, Reunited by Hilary Weisman Graham, rock bands, young adult

Giveaways galore!

Check out the MEGA Giveaway at YA Books Central.  And I do mean mega!

Also– win a road trip mixed CD (made by yours truly) over at Reading Wishes.

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Cheez-Its, Democracy, and Me

My husband is a Cheez-Its fan, and since he brings his lunch to work every day, we often have a box in the house.  Which is how I became aware of the Cheez-Its “Vote for the Top Cheese” campaign currently on the back of the box, where snackers are urged to log on to Facebook to vote for one of the eight candidates, each personifying a different flavor of cheese.

There’s Colby, the bowtie-wearing “people’s cheese,” and Cheddar Jack, adorned in a bowler tie and cowboy hat (not to be confused with Pepper Jack who wears a top hat and monocle, because the guy apparently thinks he’s Brie).   The whole thing is completely cheesy.  Maybe it’s supposed to be.   So why am I so upset that only one of the candidates for Top Cheese is a woman?

Poor Mozzarella, batting her long eyelashes demurely in her matching pearl earrings and necklace.  She looks more like Baby Swiss’s mother than the next Commander in Cheese, even as she promises to be a “cheese for change.”  Surely such a bland cheese will never win the office of Top Cheese.  But I know that someday there’ll be a female Cheez-It worthy of that role.

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The Coolest Teddy Bear in the Universe

Inside the caustic exterior, I’m a pretty sentimental person. Show me a video of an animal befriending and/or helping an animal of another species and I’ll weep like a newly crowned Miss America.  I’ve been known to tear up when the national anthem is played at youth sporting events, and I feel like my heart might just burst into a million tiny pieces whenever I see a baby call a slighter younger baby a baby.

So, I was similarly overwhelmed with emotion when my baby, now almost eight, went to Build-a-Bear with his grammie and came home with this.

 Behold Rex, the coolest teddy bear in the universe.  Note the aviator sunglasses, camo skin, and jeans slouched down to Lil’ Wayne proportions.  Yet, at the end of the day, Rex is still just a fuzzy, snuggly teddy bear.  Because even though my little boy aspires to be cool like Rex someday, right now he is a second grader who likes to sleep with his stuffed animals.  Bad-ass, skater-dude stuffed animals.

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These Books Have Actually Been Published

 

 
Though I have to agree with #6–awesome does take practice. –Hilary
1.

By the skull on the cover of this book, I can tell it’s gonna be jam packed with some bad-assery.

2.

No more trips to the gyno, just a farm.

4.

Le sigh.

5.

I’m confused if this author was a huge fan of innuendos or if this is some sort of erotica fan fiction for people who love creepy mustaches.

Via: oddee.com
6.

This is the most accurate book title ever made. Ever.

7.
8.

Evil is a strong believer in reincarnation.

9.

Turn slightly to the left.

10.

Fun for kids of all ages!

11.
12.

Yeah, tell this to my 14-year-old self. If it didn’t work in middle school, it doesn’t work now!

13.
14.

For the everyday businesswoman.

16.

Poop humor is timeless.

17.
18.

You know what makes a really great suspense thriller? FOOD PUNZ.

19.

Delicious!

20.

Because I have a feeling you’re staying out WAY to late studying.

21.

If burying your pet wasn’t depressing enough…

22.

Send them to ghost jail for stalking!

23.

I didn’t know shitting in the woods was ever considered an art, but, alright, cool.

24.

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And the winner (of the UNDER THE NEVER SKY ARC Giveaway) is…

Congratulations, reutreads.wordpress.com, you are now the proud owner of an ARC of Veronica Rossi’s UNDER THE NEVER SKY!   And 3 additional winners–Lynne, Laurisa W, & Tanya F-M. –will receive the Apocalypsies bookmark & postcard fun pack!   Winners, I will email you all to get your address.

Thanks for entering, and stay tuned for more great giveaways, including road trip mixed CD and an ARC of my book, REUNITED.

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